this is a site. you will write blogs.
is much different that what I do
Published on September 6, 2007 By secondchances In Life Journals
You are beautiful...I guess that's just how I would start
No no no. That's not right at all.
I dream of you still, I think about you night and day.
No...not right either...it's actually kind of creepy too.
When we were friends, I never knew what I had
I should have let you feel how you made me feel
Every time we touched...accidentally of course
Every time your eyes lingered on mine for just long enough to let us both know
what we were hiding from ourselves
I wish now that I could touch you again...not accidentally
I wish I could look into your eyes longer and longer still
I wish most of all that you would read this and know it is you who I am writting about.
But, you won't.
And I can't tell you what I want to tell you
Not even if you didn't know it already.

Note from the author: Yeah it doesn't rhyme. But have you ever tortured yourself to say the thing you wanted to the most after your chances have passed you by years ago? It's too late to let him know now....what can I expect?

Comments (Page 1)
on Sep 06, 2007
Poems don't have to rhyme...they are fine without rhyming.

The real thing that makes a poem great, is the pure feeling that goes behind it. To make a truly good, great, or fantastic piece of literature you need to put a bit of your heart and soul into it. Whether it be joy, anger, sadness, or regret...as long as it's real and you can put it into words then it should turn out well.

This is pretty damn good. I would eliminate the ellipses (...) though. They really don't fit well into poetry. Think hyphens, parentheses, or perhaps commas if appropriate.

~Zoo

on Sep 06, 2007
ok. no ellipses. got it. I think we are on at the same time right now. COOL! anywho, I have to leave for my last class in like 5 minutes. Thanks for everything!
S.C.
on Sep 06, 2007
Not even if you didn't know it already.


One more thing. I would consider revising this line a bit...it's a little awkward.

~Zoo
on Sep 06, 2007
YOUR AWKWARD!!!! jk thanks!
on Sep 06, 2007
Thanks for everything!


thanks!


Eh, no problem. It gives me a reason to procrastinate.

~Zoo
on Sep 10, 2007
This is an emotion that I'm entirely too close with. I hate it, and it seems to happen to me far too often.

I totally feel for ya, friend.
on Sep 17, 2007
"I wish most of all that you would read this and know it is you who I am writting about.
But, you won't."

I am sure he knows
on Sep 18, 2007
I am sure he knows


Does he, Bryan?
on Sep 18, 2007
Does he, Bryan?


I say you need to find out
on Sep 25, 2007
I say you need to find out


NS83, you are officially IMPOSSABLE.
on Sep 25, 2007
Does he, Bryan?


...hey...Jeffers?

Damnit...something's up and I have no clue what the hell's going on...

~Zoo
on Sep 25, 2007
Damnit...something's up and I have no clue what the hell's going on...


Aww...Zoo feels left out! *imagine me laughing hysterically and you'll never know why*
One day Zoo...one day.
on Sep 25, 2007
One day Zoo...one day.


Shaun would very much like to know what the hell is up. Irritating to be confused, that it is.

~Zoo
on Sep 27, 2007
NS83, you are officially IMPOSSABLE.


Oh I see you cant even use my name, I will be home this weekend do you have any time off? If you do I say we go do something.


Shaun would very much like to know what the hell is up. Irritating to be confused, that it is.


ha ha ha oh boy ummm, I shall tell you later
on Sep 27, 2007
NS83, you are officially IMPOSSABLE.


Oh I see you cant even use my name, I will be home this weekend do you have any time off? If you do I say we go do something.


Shaun would very much like to know what the hell is up. Irritating to be confused, that it is.


ha ha ha oh boy ummm, I shall tell you later